duminică, 30 septembrie 2007

Dane, ai bani la tine?

nu e stilul meu sa ma laud ca l-am vazut p'ala sau p'aia, dar intamplarea de azi m-a amuzat. Eram in parcul Herastrau, pe o alee, fusesem la masina sa iau o sticla de apa si ma grabeam spre banca pe care ma asteptau sotia si kinderul insetat. In calea mea pietonala a aparut un cuplul - pe el l-am recunoscut dupa alura si voce: Dan Petrescu. Ea, o juna cu coada de cal, mai tanara cu vreo 20 de ani decat Dan The Man (respect pentru golul dat Angliei la Mondiale in '98). Juna il intreaba pe Dan: Ai bani la tine, ca eu nu am. Dan: Am.
The end
PS - de ce m-a amuzat? Ma asteptam sa zica: N-am, dar am niste bonuri de masa, mi le-a dat Bucsaru (un baiat, patron la Unirea Urziceni, cica...) dupa meci...

Despre reclame...

O stiti p'aia (reclama) de la becere in care un baiat cica vrea sa cumpere flori de la o romanca in fata muzeului de istorie, pe calea victoriei, si nu stie ce flori sa ia si apare baiatu' ala in costum si ii spune floraresei, autoritar, domnul vrea buchetul acesta ca sarbatoreste primul an de casatorie. La care baiatul il intreaba (de parca a asistat la un truc al lui David Blaine): da' de unde stiati? Si ala in costum zice ca s-a luat dupa pachetul de cadouri si de verigheta noua... vrajeala... raspunsul corect era: de la nevasta-ta, fraiere!!!

Ma enerveaza...

...stirle din fotbal de genul: X a contribuit cu o pasa la golul dat de Y, W a centrat la golul dat de Z si altele de genul asta, despre ispravile "vedetelor" care joaca in strainatate. De ce nu dau si stiri care sa sune asa: Niculae s-a legat la sireturi in minutul 89 cind a intrat pe teren, Contra a stranutat pe banca de rezerve in minutul 27, Marica s-a scarpinat in careul mic la un corner, Codrea a flatulat la cinci metri de poarta?

Insula pe care o construiesc rusii in Marea Neagra


este o Federatie Rusa in miniatura. Chiar asa se numeste si insula: Federatia. Parca e de Asimov...

sâmbătă, 29 septembrie 2007

joi, 27 septembrie 2007

Auzita la stiri...

La Pro TV, stire cu un cerb lovit de un TIR pe sosea. Un nene se uita la cerbul decedat si zice: "era simetric (referitor la coarne), era de viitor..."

marți, 25 septembrie 2007

Sir Elton John se da la minori...

Seized 'art porn' owned by Sir Elton John

By Sophie Borland and Nigel Reynolds
A photograph by a controversial American artist which is part of Sir Elton John's private collection has been seized by police from a gallery on suspicion it may have breached child pornography laws.
# Comment: Let artists follow their instincts
# 'Art porn' image gallery hosts three explicit shows

The image, which featured two young girls one of whom was sitting down with her legs wide apart, was taken by the renowned photographer Nan Goldin.
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The shot, from the artist's Thanksgiving series, was to be exhibited at the Baltic Modern Art gallery, Tyneside, this week along with some of her other work. But the day before it was due to be viewed by the public, police came and removed the image over fears that it might be breaking the law.

It is thought that one of the assistant directors at the centre called in the authorities last Thursday after a private view as he was concerned that the picture could be offensive.

The picture is now being examined by lawyers at the Crown Prosecution Service.

Officials at the gallery confirmed that the police were involved but refused to say who had decided the picture should be removed.

Peter Doroschenko, the director of the gallery, said: "I'm afraid I can't comment on this."

Claire Byers, the communications director, said: "The police are involved in this incident and we are fully cooperating with their inquiries. That is all I can say on this at the moment."

The image is being examined by police and lawyers from the Crown Prosecution Service are offering preliminary advice.

A Northumbria police spokesman said yesterday: "The circumstances around who may have been involved in the production of the image and who may have owned it or owns it forms part of the investigation.

"We attended the Baltic Centre last Thursday at the invitation of the management who were seeking advice about an item for an exhibition prior to it going on public display.

"This item is being assessed and Northumbria Police, in consultation with the CPS, is investigating the circumstances surrounding it. The incident is ongoing and investigations are now being carried out."

Goldin, 54, is well known for her shots of young, semi-clothed girls.

Thanksgiving is described by the Baltic as an installation of photographs which documents Goldin's life from 1973 to 1999 - "a micro-retrospective of her career."

In 2001, one of her photos featuring a very young naked girl looking up between the open legs of a semi-clothed older child had been criticised for making money from exploiting children. It was published in a book alongside similar works to accompany an exhibition at the Saatchi Gallery in north London.

Goldin was born in Washington DC, ran away from home and was fostered by several families during her childhood. She moved to New York after graduating from art school where she took became known for pictures of alcoholics, drug addicts and Aids sufferers.

She was admitted to rehab in the 1990s and much of her work since has reflected her own experiences.

Sir Elton John has long been an admirer of her work and is also a close friend. He was not available for comment and a spokesman referred inquiries to the Baltic.

This is not the first time an artist's pictures of children has been stripped from a public gallery over fears that it was obscene.

joi, 20 septembrie 2007

Pietoni, vi se pregateste ceva...


Politia rutiera, in intelepciunea ei, a gasit o noua joaca si sursa de bani: pista. Pista pentru bicilisti. Iata ce ne anunta Rompres, citandu-l pe comisarul Dan Nicolae.
"Bicicliştii şi mopediştii vor fi amendaţi dacă nu vor circula pe pistele amenajate special pentru ei, acolo unde acestea există. De asemenea, vor fi sancţionaţi atât conducătorii de autovehicule care opresc sau staţionează pe aceste piste, cât şi pietonii care le folosesc, a declarat, miercuri, agenţiei ROMPRES, comisar Dan Nicolae, de la Brigada de Poliţie Rutieră (BPR) a Capitalei.
Potrivit comisarului Dan Nicolae, bicicliştii şi mopediştii care vor fi surprinşi că circulă pe partea carosabilă, deşi au posibilitatea să se deplaseze pe pista special amenajată, vor fi sancţionaţi cu 6 - 8 puncte amendă. 'La intersecţii, bicicliştii vor respecta semnalele semafoarelor special instalate pentru aceştia, iar acolo unde ele lipsesc, traversarea se va face pietonal, după ce au coborât de pe bicicletă, şi la culoarea verde a semaforului'.
Totodată, a adăugat Nicolae, conducătorii auto care vor staţiona sau opri pe această bandă vor fi sancţionaţi cu două sau trei puncte amendă şi două puncte penalizare, precum şi pietonii (cu două sau trei puncte amendă) care circulă pe pistele pentru biciclete, amenajate şi semnalizate corespunzător.
În prezent, au fost amenajate astfel de piste pe Şos. Kiseleff, B-dul Libertăţii şi Splaiul Independenţei, urmând ca numărul acestora să crească în viitorul apropiat, îndeosebi în zona centrală a Capitalei."
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Abia astept sa-l vad pe politistul ala care imi da amenda pentru ca am circulat per pedes pe pista biciclistilor...

luni, 17 septembrie 2007

Un nou judet pe harta iubitei nostre Patrii...

Un bărbat a murit, iar un altul a suferit o reacţie alergică acută, după ce au fost atacaţi de bondari , în timp ce se aflau la cules de mere într-o livadă din comuna Albeşti, judeţul Albeş, transmite corespondentul MEDIAFAX.

vineri, 14 septembrie 2007

Al Qaeda is full of shit

"Ana raicha Al Qaeda" is colloquial for "I'm going to the toilet". A very common and widespread use of the word "Al-Qaeda" in different Arab countries in the public language is for the toilet bowl. This name comes from the Arabic verb "Qa'ada" which mean "to sit", pertinently, on the "Toilet Bowl". In most Arabs homes there are two kinds of toilets: "Al-Qaeda" also called the "Hamam Franji" or foreign toilet, and "Hamam Arabi" or "Arab toilet" which is a hole in the ground. Lest we forget it, the potty used by small children is called "Ma Qa'adia" or "Little Qaeda".

So, if you were forming a terrorist group, would you call yourself, "The Toilet"?

Sa revenim la ale noastre...

The Finnish Islamic Party plans to collect 5,000 signatures in order to qualify for official registration by the end of the year. Counting on support from the 55,000 Muslims living in Finland, the party anticipates some success in next year’s municipal elections as well as in the 2011 parliamentary elections. Party spokesman Abdullah Tammi acknowledged to reporters that to date the party has enrolled only a few dozen members.

The Finnish Islamic Party platform supports a ban on alcohol sales, the option for Muslim children to be excused from school music classes and outings to swimming pools, legal status for ritual animal killing and male circumcision, and the eventual introduction of shari’a law in Finland. Tammi added that the purpose of Sharia law was to prevent crime.

COMENTARIU - Faza cu interzicerea alcoolului la vanzare o sa le placa finlandezilor. Si aia cu sharia e mishto...